Blogging Blues

It can get frustrating sometimes. 

I blog about my thoughts, my experiences, my feelings about matters, how i view the world… Sometimes i go on and on and i feel good about myself after finishing a piece.  I feel good about having to express myself.  I think about the readers whose lives I will touch or whose feelings I will move with my insights.  I think about the ones I will entertain with my sometimes shallow humor.  I think about the people who will smile after reading about an escapade.  And I feel happy… satisfied… proud, even.

Then after half a day has passed, I will check my stats… only to find out that there’s just one reader –who probably just happened to find my site by chance and decided to stay on it and read…

I will try to check again come night time… and then I will see that the lone reader is still very much alone.

The following day before I post another blog, I will check my stats once more to see if there was any movement while I was sleeping… hoping that I have loyal followers from another time zone.  Sometimes i get two or three more. On good days, I will probably have 5.

Yes, it can get frustrating somewhat.

Sometimes I wonder if I am really a good writer… because if I were interesting enough, then maybe I will have more followers.  Right now I think the only people who constantly follow my blogs are my cousin/person, my close friend (when not busy and when reminded)… and oh yeah, Me. 

So, so sad.

But then when I think about it, I remember the reason why I started all these…

I started blogging for self-expression.  I started blogging because I loved writing and I express myself better with written words.  Make me speak in front of people and I will probably spend thirty minutes vomiting before every speech.  If you want to know my thoughts, make me sit down and write.  It’s much easier for me that way. Besides, there’s always delete.  I can edit out the words that don’t fit.

I blog because I get to think about things whenever I write about them.  I get to ask myself questions, and most of the time I find the answers, as well.  Of course I would love to be able to share my ideas and thoughts and misadventures with someone.  I would love to inspire people.  Putting a smile on a reader’s face is a nice outcome.  But then given that I don’t have much followers yet, well, I blog more for myself. 

Sometimes my topic don’t make much sense.  Well, a lot of the things in this world don’t make much sense.  But they make life more interesting in a way. 

I blog because writing is a passion.  I am a writer… and writers write. 

I do believe that if I keep blogging, they — my readers– will come.  And so I keep the faith.

Le Penne

 

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photo credit: weheartit.com